After leaving Chicago, The Fool toddled along to Niles, IL in crappy weather. He was getting pretty tired of the endless suburbs, and really was longing for some countryside. The next best thing was a "Forest Preserve" in Niles, where he camped Monday night. Although there weren't any "NO CAMPING" signs around, he suspected that camping was not a welcome activity there, so he made sure to hide himself pretty well. He slept under the stars, but then around 4am it started to rain, and he got to practice his rapid tent deployment skills. He started to scream in frustration when he thought he had lost the tent stakes, but then he found them. It was still drizzling throughout the morning the next day, so he finally just packed up around noon during a brief break in the rain.
The rain was just a warm-up for his visit to the Niles Burger King that afternoon. He was sitting down with some food, and was charging his cell-phone at a nearby outlet, when the manager stomped over and yanked the cord out of the wall and started yelling all about "This is private property!!! You can't do that!!!" The WF tried to explain that he was walking across America, and how he had found Burger Kings (and their managers) to be very hospitable along the way. She replied "I don't care!!!" He left Niles with a heavy heart - unsure if he would return to Burger King again on his journey. (Don't worry - those Chicken Tender Sandwiches will bring him back. He's a fool... remember?)
The Fool's big destination of the week was coming up - Des Plaines, Illinois! It is home to the FIRST MCDONALD'S IN THE WORLD!!! Unfortunately Mark discovered that the McDonald's museum that occupies the building is only open 3 days a week, and Tuesday isn't one of those days. Mark had to satisfy himself with a meal in the modern McDonald's restaurant across the street. While Mark was in the McDonald's, he became aware that he had attracted the attention of a bunch of 16-17 yr old 'hooligans.' He could tell by the silence as he walked by, followed by weird dopey laughter. When he was leaving, he realized that the teens were leaving too, packing into their mom's luxury SUV. The Fool continued on walking, by was quickly caught up by the SUV full of the jerky teens who screamed the typical "Duuuhh-blaaaa-gaa-huuurrrrhh!!!" as they drove by. Mark started to prepare himself for worse, and also tried to come up with something clever to say, as he saw the SUV turn around, back in his direction. Then, as the SUV whipped by, someone threw a milkshake at him. It all happened in slow motion... he tried to turn... he started to jump sideways... but it hit him anyway. Just to make sure they knew they were dealing with a Fool, he took off running after them - with full pack! They managed to shoot off on a side street, and so they were spared his Fool Vengeance. The adventures of the day, combined with the continuing rain, seemed to all point to one thing:
DES PLAINES, ILLINOIS SUCKS!!!!
Shortly after what has come to be known as the Milkshake Incident, Mark encountered a slightly nutty but nice homeless guy, who lives in his van "by the river." He took the WF for a traveling homeless guy (as many police officers seem to do) and asked if he needed a day's work. The scruffy man said knew a place that would hire him for sure. He also commented that the Fool had traveled a hell of a long way to see a hamburger joint. The WF had no comment in return. Interestingly, the guy also said "Don't even think about sleeping in the Forest Preserve. The cops'll get you for sure and drag you to the station way over on the other side of town.
As if to adjust the cosmic balance for The Fool unwittingly escaping the notice of the authorities the night before, he was "pulled over" about 10 miles outside of Des Plaines. The officer used number 3 out of the three standard excuses that The Fool has become familiar with:
1. "I thought you might need a ride."
2. "I thought you were going to get hit by a car."
3. "Did you just throw something - a bottle or something - back there - back at that intersection?"
She pulled him over by pulling in front of him into a parking lot that he was crossing. After a quick ID check, she seemed satisfied, and let him continue his walk across the country. While The Fool understands that the men and women of law enforcement have a job to do, and he is definitely an unusual sight, he's getting a bit tired of the "game" that he keeps having to play with them, where they sort of invent a reason for stopping him, and then they eventually ask him what his story is, and then they let him go. He can't really suggest a better way to do things, but it's getting old, nonetheless.
The cops would probably have frowned on it, but The Fool camped out in the woods near some railroad tracks, not long after his encounter with the officer.
Wednesday found him in Crystal Lake. Perhaps the inspiration for the lake in the Friday the 13th movies? Who knows. Crystal Lake was interesting in that it was sort of a city that sprang up out of nowhere, and had TONS of shops and plazas - even old familiar sites such as Barnes & Noble, Circuit City, etc, that he hasn't seen much of since he left the east coast.
Since his tent was REALLY starting to get stinky and mildewed and covered with mud, from all the rain, he made it a priority to visit a laundromat in Crystal Lake. That done, it was getting late, and so he grabbed a snack in a Mobil station before finding a spot to camp. As he paid for his Slim-Jim and King Size Snickers Bar (which contains a whopping 600 calories, by the way - that's about a meal right there), he asked the punkish kid (who was listening to punkish music on a little radio) how far he had to go to get out of town - to where the stores ended and he might be able to camp out. The punkish kid REALLY did not comprehend what the Fool was asking, in a fundamental way. He really seemed confused. He came back with "Where are you going? What town do you want to go to?" "If you want a place to stay there's a motel over there." He couldn't grasp the idea of utilizing the space between the towns.
Thursday was a decent day. The Fool walked through Woodstock and Harvard, and then crossed into Wisconsin near a little town called Bigfoot! (That makes his sixth state!) He ended up camping in Walworth, WI Thursday night.
The Fool has been seeing lots of Norwegian flags all over the place now, and he actually met a really nice Norwegian farmer as he walked by a house on a little country road. The guy had been in the Korean War, and had also climbed Mt. Fuji in Japan. He revealed a fact that The Fool was unaware of - Mt. Fuji is all sandy - it's made of lots of volcanic ash. So when you walk up it, you take two steps up and sink one step down.
Friday was marked by an encounter with another random nice guy named Phil. The Fool had collapsed for a rest on the side of a little back road, and as a car pulled out of a driveway, he realized he was actually sitting on part of the guy's lawn, but the guy didn't say anything and just drove away. A few minutes later he came back, and asked him if he was ok, if he needed a drink, etc etc - he said he looked like a professional hiker. (Phil should do some workshops for the police force over in Illinois, perhaps.) The WF went up and sat in the shade while Phil brought him some cider and water. Phil then had to leave again for work, but told him to use the bathroom if he needed to, and gave him his sister's address outside Madison, and said she would give him some food, and even let him ride her horses if he wanted. The Walking Fool finally headed out, but later that day, just as he was passing through a roadside picnic area, Phil drove up in his car, to give him a corrected version of his sister's address and a few snacks. Phil is definitely the nice guy of the week - and maybe of the month.
The Fool thinks that Friday might have been one of his longest days in terms of distance covered – close to 31 miles. He went through Darien, wound all around and finally got to Janesville by evening. Friday night The Fool found a Motel 6 in Janeville for 33 bucks - he didn't even bother to ask for a discount, at that rate.
Saturday night brought him to Edgerton, where he got a hot meal at an A&W restaurant, then camped with the mosquitoes.
Sunday was a somewhat crappy day, because The Fool accidentally went 2 miles backwards (that being EAST) and then had to march back over his footsteps. This was especially annoying because he has to be in Madison at 6am the next morning for a TV interview on NBC 15!!! The Fool kept up a good pace on Sunday, and soon made up his lost time. Unfortunately he forgot to listen to his body, and as he came into Stoughton, he found he had an amazingly powerful need to use a restroom. He quickly discovered that all the restaurants etc are on "the other side of Stoughton" - which he eventually reached, just in time. McDonald's is now forgiven for the strange hours of the "First McDonald's Museum."
As of this journal posting, The Fool has not set up camp for Sunday night yet, but it will be "somewhere in Madison."
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